Couples Therapy
in Los Gatos, California
Love doesn’t have to feel this hard.
Connection is possible.
The distance, the recurring arguments, the shutdown, the defensiveness. They didn’t appear out of nowhere. Most couples aren’t fighting about the surface issue. Beneath the conflict are hurt feelings, the walls that going up, and a deep longing to feel seen, valued, and understood.
In our work together, we slow the pattern down. We look at what happens inside each of you when you feel criticized, rejected, overwhelmed, or alone and how those reactions collide. Instead of debating who’s right, we focus on understanding the cycle that keeps you stuck.
This work is for couples ready to examine their own patterns with honesty and courage. Not to blame, but to understand. Not to win, but to reconnect.
Couples therapy isn’t about taking sides. It's about feeling safe enough to actually say what's true, and trusting your partner to meet you there.
When you can recognize the pattern, and reach for each other differently within it, the relationship begins to feel like a team again.
Learn About Couples Therapy Specialities in California
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Infidelity & Trust Recovery Therapy
Healing after an affair or rupture of trust. Los Gatos, CA
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Reconnection & Intimacy Therapy
Finding your way back to closeness and connection. Los Gatos, CA
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Premarital Counseling
Building a strong foundation before the next step. Los Gatos, CA
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Relationship Clarity
Getting honest answers when you're stuck between staying and leaving. Los Gatos, CA
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Communication Therapy for Couples
Learning to hear each other instead of talking in circles. Los Gatos, CA
The patterns that are hurting your relationship made sense at some point. Therapy helps you understand where they came from and build something different together.
What you’ll gain from Couples Therapy in the Bay Area
What couples therapy can offer you
A way out of the cycle — understand the pattern underneath the argument, not just the argument itself
Real repair after a breach of trust — rebuild safety and connection in a way that actually holds
Communication that doesn't spiral — learn to express what you actually need without it turning into a fight
Understanding each other's wiring — see how your individual histories shape how you show up with each other
A stronger foundation — whether you're newly together or decades in, build the kind of relationship that can handle real life
Closeness that feels safe — move from distance and defense to genuine intimacy and trust
Much of my couples work is informed by research from The Gottman Institute on what actually predicts relationship success and breakdown.
What couples therapy can help with:
Old patterns from before this relationship that keep showing up in it
What sessions actually look like:
Couples therapy with me isn't about taking sides or deciding who's right. Most sessions start with what's actually happening between you right now, not just what you're arguing about, but the pattern underneath it. We slow down enough to see what each of you does when things get hard, and why.
Some sessions are about a specific conflict. Others are about the history each of you brought into this relationship, and how it's shaping what's happening now. There's no fixed script. We follow what's actually alive in the room.
Getting Started with Couples Therapy in California
Next Steps to Start Couples Therapy:
Step 1.
Book a free consultation call
I offer a free 15-minute consultation for couples considering therapy. It's a chance for both of you to ask questions, get a feel for how I work, and see if this feels like the right fit before committing to anything. Finding a good match matters, it's one of the strongest predictors of whether couples therapy actually helps.
Step 2.
Schedule your first session
Once we've talked, we'll find a weekly time that works for both of you. Session frequency matters even more when two people are trying to change a shared pattern together, not just one. A review spanning 70 psychotherapy trials found that how often people met with their therapist was a stronger predictor of progress than the total number of sessions or how long treatment lasted overall. After scheduling, you'll both get an email with a link to your client portal to complete intake forms before we meet.
Step 3.
Start understanding your pattern
The first few sessions are about hearing both of your histories, what's brought you in together, and what each of you is hoping changes. I'll share what I'm noticing about the pattern between you, not to assign blame, but so you both understand what's actually happening underneath the conflict. This is something we build together, at a pace that works for both of you.
Frequently Asked Questions
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A lot of couples therapy stays surface-level, focused on communication scripts without addressing what's driving the pattern underneath. This work goes further, into the family-of-origin and attachment patterns that are actually running the show.
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That's common, and it doesn't mean this can't work. Often the more hesitant partner becomes more engaged once they see the sessions aren't about blame.
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Feeling distant doesn't mean it's over. A lot of couples come in feeling like the damage is done, and find there's more still there than they realized. We won't know what's possible until we actually look.
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Yes. I work with couples across every stage, from dating to decades in. What matters more than how long you've been together is what's happening between you now.
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In couples work, I don't hold individual secrets between the two of you. If something significant comes up privately, we'll talk about how and whether it belongs in the room together.
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No. When there’s active domestic violence or abuse in a relationship, couples therapy isn’t appropriate, and it can actually be unsafe. Couples work relies on both partners being able to speak honestly in the room, which isn’t possible when one partner is unsafe with the other.
If this describes your relationship, individual therapy is the clinically appropriate next step, not couples work. You’re welcome to reach out by email if you’d like guidance on referrals for individual support in your area.
If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911. For confidential support, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-799-7233, or online at thehotline.org.
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No. My job isn't to referee or assign blame. It's to help you both see the pattern you're stuck in, not just the specific fight, so you can respond differently.
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Yes. I work with couples of all orientations and gender identities. The patterns that bring couples into therapy, disconnection, communication breakdowns, trust ruptures, aren't limited to any one kind of relationship, and neither is this work.
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It depends on what you're working through. Some couples come in for a specific issue and see shifts within a few months. Others are doing deeper relational work that takes longer. We'll check in regularly on how it's going.
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That's actually useful information, not something to avoid. Watching how you two get stuck in real time helps us understand the pattern better than talking about it after the fact.
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Yes, all sessions are telehealth, serving couples throughout California. Many couples find it easier to be fully present in a familiar space rather than adding a commute on top of an already hard conversation.
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I ask for 48 hours notice if you need to cancel or reschedule a session. Cancellations made with less notice than that are subject to the full session fee.